To My "Friend"

Dear Wild Turkey,

Well, it had been a while, hadn't it? Years, in fact. I couldn't even remember the last time we hung out, so when you made an appearance on Saturday night, it seemed like a good idea. We had had fun before -- a lot of fun-- and, well, I'm a bit of a sucker for old memories. Especially when they are so fun. You with your brown, sweetness...well, I couldn't say no.

It turns out you changed, but for the better. Now, you have a honey flavor, too. Sometimes, a change is a bad thing, but in this case? Oh my, so tempting, so luscious, so naughty. You just made the night better.

So, I couldn't say no. You kept coming back all night, wanting more, seeming to be thrust into my hands without me even asking...and you kept getting better and better as the night went on. By the time we killed the bottle and closed the bar, well, it was all good.

And it was good until 5:30 in the morning. Really, I couldn't say no, though I knew (sort-of) better. But, it was OK. Until the next day.

Oh, Wild Turkey, I remembered why I didn't hang out with you anymore. Achy head, achy body, achy tummy. Exhaustion, confusion, fogginess. Missing out on the beach because the thought of being in the sun, or even moving at all makes me want to puke.

So, Wild Turkey, we're through. I'll have to say no, I'll have to just pass, because you are no good for me. But, like all things not good for me, like all bad boys, I won't be able to say no.