Oh Yeah, I Forgot

The end of the school year is as crazy and busy as the beginning of the school year.

Only four more weeks after this one.

Thank you, God.

Jacksonville Confidential: 100 Single Ladies

I don't know if this is horrifying or fabulous.

Jacksonville Confidential: 100 Single Ladies

The Adult Is Back. Sort Of.

So I am over my whiny bitch session from yesterday.

We have a lot to be thankful for, and I have to keep telling myself that -- we both have jobs, e can pay our bills, though we have absolutely nothing left over, we have a great house, we live five minutes from the beach, we have wonderful family and friends, all of that stuff.

But holy crap, it would be great to win lotto.

Ugh

I've really been very happy lately, none of that depression that seemed to take up most of last year, AND I've been listening to lots of Mika, so how can you feel sad then?

But then, there's all this money shit. Ugh. When we went house hunting and buying, we were all, "we are not purchasing a fixer-upper, no way!" because we saw some of those, and our thinking was that we didn't have the extra money to sink into things like new plumbing, central air, washing machines, and roofs...

Oh, wait.

We still don't have the money, yet we still are having to deal with all of this shit and you know I am over it.

Today, I am over being an adult.

Why did we stop renting? We could be renting a house two blocks from the beach and be paying $1000. For a two-bedroom house. Two blocks from the beach, and I could ride my bike to work. Also into town. And we wouldn't be tied down, and we wouldn't have a fucking mortgage and have to deal with shit like new roofs or washing machines or home repairs and I am so over it all.

The irony is that I made literally double my salary when I was a journalist, and was only 24, and lived a much more glamorous life, traveling all over the world and renting for Christ's sake and not tied down. Ugh. And not having to spend $8,000 on a new fucking roof. Oh and probably $1,000 more for new fucking gutters.

Of course, I am much happier in a lot of ways now, and I love Pete and wouldn't trade that for anything. But seriously?

Over this.

In Paris

Looking in Paris in this light, I was reminded that I should be feeling In Love. I had heard and read how beautiful the city was, this City of Lights, and I had seen the pictures of people kissing by the Eiffel Tower and holding hands as they meandered down side streets filled with vendors. But I just wasn't feeling it.

Oh, I loved the city. I knew that as soon as I stepped off the plane in my jet-lagged haze that I loved the city. I had studied French and French culture since I had been in middle school, all the way through college, and I had finally made my way the city I had spent years dreaming about. I, too, would sit in a cafe drinking coffee, maybe smoking a cigarette, discussing the works of Voltaire and Camus.

Instead, I was walking through the streets of a city I had fallen in love with before I even got there with a man I had fallen out of love with before the relationship had even gotten started. Yes, we sat in the cafe and had Meaningful Discussions, but while we talked about existentialism and Impressionism, we ignored the fact that this wasn't going anywhere.

Some Fabulously Horrible Cheese

Greatly awful songs I love (in no particular order, of course):

1. Ice, Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice: I love this song so much, in fact, that we had our wedding party introduced to it during our wedding reception. We put the ass in class, you know.

2. I Wanna Sex You Up by Color Me Bad: For real! This song came out when I first started being goth in ninth grade, but I LOVED it. Jen and I would watch it sneakily after 120 minutes and we weren't sure if we loved that song or the latest Ministry song more.

3. The Sign by Ace of Base: It is just so awesome. I love the message. I mean, I am not even kidding when I say that. I know, I am really lame. I accept this about me.

4. Pretty much anything by the Spice Girls: This is so cheesy, but my roommates and I in college, in the privacy of our apartment, declared that we were indeed the Spice Girls, and we were each one of them. Honestly, the ones we were really suited our personalities. I was Ginger Spice -- you know, the one that posed in Playboy and wore lingerie.

5. I Want It That Way by the Backstreet Boys: Rachael, Jen, and I loved this song. It is awesome to sing along to. It is also a really bad song. But I still love it.

6. It Wasn't Me by Shaggy: Excellent. So bad, yet so good. I actually think his other songs are good and not cheesy, but this song is so corny. But, I love it.

7. And now, something I have only admitted to a handful of people (really): I am obsessed with Mariah Carey. I love her. She is another one that came out when I was all goth, but I secretly loved her. I have all of her CDs. It is so embarrassing, but it's true. Vision of Love? DreamLover? I Still Believe? Classics.

Wow, have you lost any respect for me? I think I lost a little of myself with number 7!

Hating On

What I am hating on right now:

1. High school drama. For real.

2. Having to get a new roof.

3. Not being independently wealthy yet.

4. Brangelina. Enough already. Also? Madonna. I LOATHE you and your Malawi babies.

5. Speeding tickets.

6. Not being able to travel anywhere, at anytime.

7. Rescue Me being on at 10 p.m. We grannies need to watch it at 9, because by 10 it is lights out!

2009's Official List

You know what list I'm talking about. In no particular order (and bring me my free pass):

1. Robert Downey, Jr.

2. Sawyer on Lost (only if he dresses/acts/talks like Sawyer, not the real-live guy that plays him)

3. Robert Pattinson

4. Orlando Bloom

5. Johnny Depp

6. Adam Levine

7. Clive Owen

8. Gael García Bernal

9. Joaquin Phoenix (pre-"rap" star)

10. Javier Bardem

Can you spot a theme?

****HOW COULD I FORGET DENNIS LEARY?????

Yes, You Should Be Scared

I've written before (and certainly talked about it a lot) the crazy, wild-ness that is living in Florida. There are all sorts of crazy bugs, animals, reptiles, and people that live here. Many of them live in my yard, in fact (not the people), so one has to be vigilant when doing yard work.

This weekend, I got home to do some serious yard activity. Mowing the lawn, weeding, digging up these old bushes, clearing away sticks -- I have a regular green thumb. Maybe not a green thumb,more like a green pinkie, but I'm getting there.

I started off mowing the lawn, and as I made a sweep in the front yard near our landscaped bushes, flowers, and mulch, I startled a three-foot black racer snake from its sunbathing. In response, it slithered into a hole in the bricks in the side of our house.

...

"WOOOOOO!" I cried when I saw it, since not only did I scare the shit out of it, but it most certainly did not make me feel very easy when it slipped into the house. Pete just had pulled in the driveway at that time with our lunch, so I called him over to check out the racer that was poking its head out of the hole. In Our House.

"Do you think it can get inside?" I asked.

"No," said Pete with authority, "no way. It will only get under the house. Let's eat."

Not really encouraged with this explanation, I took a break from mowing to eat. When I came back out, I inspected the hole, and the snake was gone. But I really didn't want to be startled by it, and since my new plan was to run it over with the mower (I know, I know, it gets worse), I inspected the rest of the yard. There it was, hanging out by our palm tree. Since it was so close to the tree, I decided I would hack it up with a shovel. Pete came and thwarted my plan when he chased the snake over to the neighbor's yard while I was getting the shovel, and just told me to "be vigilant."

I was, and finished up with the front yard and then moved on to the back. I was clearing branches and weeding before mowing when I saw that damn snake again by the other palm trees. I raced to get my shovel, only to be thwarted again when the snake slipped away while I was getting the shovel because the neighbor's dog came out and started barking.

Of course, the whole rest of the time I was on the look out for the snake, but it didn't come back. I have a feeling this battle is not yet over.

Things I Can't Say No To....

1. Chips and salsa, especially when they are restaurant-fresh out of the fryer.

2. Fries. Crispy, delicious, steak fries. You keep your shoestrings to yourself.

3. Coffee. I said no for the last six or so months, all while pining in my heart. Today I said yes again, and I just can't go back to the land of no coffee.

4. Working out. My OCD and extra energy prevents me from just lying around after work. I must work out, even if I am sick or tired. It is kind-of annoying.

5. The Amazing Race. So awesome. Fay and I WILL be on the show.

6. Facebook and other social networking. I just need to know what is going on. I can say no to MySpace, though. Totally over it.

7. Really good sangria. You know, with fruit chunks in it? So fabulous. Also? Very dirty Kettle One martinis. Ah.

8. The beach. Always.

9. Mamba. That's my cat. Unless he gets on a table or counter (because that is disgusting!), he gets away with anything. Mostly because he is so sweet.

10. Pasta. Rice. Bread. Bring on the carbs!